Some kinds of missing can creep up on us gradually. Life goes along from one day to the next with everything the same. Then an event or a memory triggers a reminder that something or someone is missing.

This was not like that. We missed Amelia immediately.

Amelia had always been the one to stand guard while everyone was scratching and pecking in the yard. As the leader of the flock, Gracie would sometimes join her, but she appreciated Amelia’s willingness to give the gift of her time. Amelia would stand silently and only make an alarm call when she sensed something might be dangerous and hiding in the shadows.

Here on the wild river, there was nothing but shadows. It was so late, and she was so tired. The moon was so full and bright. As it had risen in the sky, she thought that she was getting closer. It had to be closer. It just had to be.

She had flown almost the entire day from tree to tree. This was not flying the way she had remembered it. With an entire flock, flying is different. By herself, she was more aware of her limitations.

She realized she was not like the Canadian geese who had moved into our neighborhood and had flown so high and for such great distances. Even though she had always been the best flyer, she realized that even at her best, she could only fly like a chicken.

Amelia was glad Emily was not there. Emily had always looked up to her. Emily would not look up to her if she saw her there alone in the middle of the wild river searching for a safe place to roost for the night.

There was no way of knowing what was in the hollow of the tree. That would not be safe. The limbs above would be safer perhaps, but if she closed her eyes, what might grab her while she slept?

For a moment, she longed for the warmth and safety of home. Then she remembered why she was doing this. It was not for herself. It was not to prove that she could fly to the moon and back. It was for Emily.

Emily had leaned on Amelia for too long. Emily had a gift within herself that would never be fulfilled until she learned to stand on her own. Amelia did not know what that gift was. She only knew she had to let Emily find it on her own.

Amelia was not lost. She had made her map of the world, and she could find her way back home any time she wanted. She was not afraid, not yet. But she was alone out there on the wild river.

I still need to find out if I can be lost and not afraid, she told herself. I need to know that as surely as Emily needs to discover her gift.

 

15 thoughts on “Amelia On The Wild River

  1. I have been alone and without friends for a few years now and it’s been lonely but I don’t think I would have done the things I’ve done or grown the way I have if they hadn’t walked away from me. Beautiful words as always.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Lisa. I know about loneliness too, and I think you’re right…there is a value in it perhaps because we are more likely to look inside ourselves…perhaps maybe even make friends with ourselves (if that makes sense). I’m looking forward to expanding on the story about Amelia and Emily in a black-and-white illustrated book. Interestingly, the reading level for this post (and the others like it) comes out to being 3rd grade. When I’m writing for color illustrated books, the reading level usually comes out as anywhere from 4th to 6th grade, and then I have to rewrite a lot more to keep everything at no more than 4th grade. I think the shorter format required for a reasonably priced book in color forces me to write more complicated sentences which increase the reading level. I have a feeling that if I did a grade level test on all of the posts here with comments like “beautiful words,” I’d find that they are written on a 3rd grade reading level as well. I think there’s a lesson there! Thanks so very much!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I love Amelia very much…and of course, everybody has to gather his/ her very own experience to learn about himself.
    But I guess, the only chance to experience the feelings of “getting lost” might be the continued attempt to be a Canadian goose or somebody else, focusing on your alleged deficits instead of cultivatiing your strengths.
    Of course, you will feel lonely too because nobody will possibly see your true self behind the facade.
    It might be more challenging to overcome your fears of “being found”…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’ve not heard of him or this song, so I just pulled up the lyrics and listened to the song. So much of the words are exactly what Amelia would say, especially the first part…”

      Come on hold my hand
      I wanna contact the living
      Not sure I understand
      This role I’ve been given

      And, of course, these words which are repeated…

      I just wanna feel real love
      Feel the home that I live in

      Perhaps we are all less fearless and more fearless that what we imagine based on the circumstances? And what is at stake? Anyway, thank you for sharing this song with me. I’ve bookmarked it to my favorites to read the lyrics and listen to again!

      Liked by 2 people

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